glamcamchic:

balloonney:

LISTEN UP YOU LITTLE SHITS

he doesn’t just want to get to the other side of the road

he wants to get to

the other side

the motherfucking chicken is suicidal

oh my fuck MY LIFE IS A LIE

themightynarwhal:

sloths are cute but their skeletons are fucking creepy i mean

looks like something a nightmare pooped out

*hides good snacks from family members*

(Source: foodchewer)

departured:

I think the weirdest thing is that the person you’re going to marry and spend the rest of your life together with is currently walking the earth, living their own life, going to school or going to work or whatever, doing all these things and making all these memories that you’ll get to hear about from them years from now.

(Source: departured)

welcometohiddlehell:

crumpetmarypoppinstea:

twiliprincess:

is it bad that i’ve

watched hair tutorials for girls as future reference

for when i have daughters

because i want to be the kind of dad that knows how to do his daughter’s hair

this is the cutest thing I have ever read omg

(Source: venipede)

I’m literally my own best friend like I have inside jokes with myself and sometimes I’ll think something funny and start laughing out loud at how funny I am

(Source: eyeslikestyles)

amazzingphil:

[IT IS PERFECTLY OKAY TO LOVE A BAND’S MOST POPULAR SONG THERE IS A REASON IT IS THEIR MOST POPULAR SONG]

nahshaw:

i went out to eat lunch with my mom and i forgot what a knife was called so i asked the waitress for “one of those things that you use to stab people with”